This post is not about evangelism, but it is about something else that is dear to me and that is parenting. Last night, I had to deal with a rough situation that we all do as parents, especially if you have or have had little boys.
We have been teaching and disciplining our son from a biblical sense, even though he is only about 2 and a half years old. I could go on and on about how intelligent and advanced I think he is, but that would be the proud daddy in me talking : )
As he entered into the toddler years he began doing the natural things such as hitting back, not sharing, and taking toys from others. He has progressively gotten MUCH better as when he is disciplined we explain WHY he is being disciplined and are on the situation right away. This is greatly reinforced, the part where they are on it right away, at his day care and my wife and I are truly grateful for the staff they have.
Last night, he was playing by himself at a relatives house to himself. Usually two others toddlers take his toys, mess with him, or do other things that he is not used to. It breaks my heart, but it has provided great teachable moments for my little boy.
The two began jumping on him while he was playing on the ground with his cars and began to hit him. Grayson, very upset, simply got up and ran into the other room with his toys. This doesn't sound like a big deal, but it is a HUGE deal to me and I will tell you why. As a dad, growing up in martial arts, and someone that used to be into the rough and tough sports, my natural reaction was to want my son to hit them back or push them down. Dads typically want their sons to not be a "sissy", or "wimp". I believe that is prevalent in our society as well, "if they hit you first, you hit back"!
A couple months ago he would have definitely hit back or pushed them down. However, when I understood why he didn't hit back this time and left the situation I realized that is what we taught him to do. I was instantly convicted of my feeling and was so proud of my boy. I know it sounds silly as he is only a toddler, but he grasps the understanding of when certain situations occur. He knows he has to make a choice. As adults we tend to forget that children have choices, even though they have natural tendencies. Just like as adults we have a natural sin-nature and we have to constantly repent, thus making the right choice. We are really not all that different.
When someone tries to take a toy from my son, I tell my son to let them have it. Why? Most will say that it's not fair because my child had the toy first, however, my son is then being selfish and not sharing. We tend to forget that both children are actually sinning, the one trying to steal, and the one being selfish. Since I started that I have seen my son begin to truly show humbleness, as a TODDLER.
My point in all this is, as a Christian, I have realized that I will experience heart ache as I see more of these situations happening, but it is truly the best for my son. My goal is for him to be raised with biblical principles, having a humble, loving, and serving heart for God and people. That is more important than being a star football player, tough kid in school, or any other macho stereotype I had growing up.
I do believe in self-defense if your life is in danger, but not when it comes to silly fights as I see and have experienced as a boy growing up, through school, and teaching at school. I pray that my son will continue to grow in this manner and make these kinds of choices. I also pray that I will continue to have the realization that I had last night and be proud and supportive of these kind of choices rather than let my natural sinful side for him to retaliate to come in.
As Christians it is inevitable that we will suffer trials and tribulations, because darkness hates the light as the bible says. To what extent, it's impossible to know. I shouldn't expect any less for myself or my family, but God is and should always be first. I naturally want to shield my son from the world when it comes to this, but if I do that how will he ever have a chance to change it.
Anyways, I really wanted to share this and I hope you enjoyed it and maybe learned something from this experience. May God bless you and your little ones as well!
In Christ,
Joey
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